Life-enriching?

Uggghhhh.....

I took a stack of forms to the local IRS office recently. Turns out they 'lost' half of it.

Of all the little bits of bullshit paper they've managed to save, keep and lovingly archive for use in hanging me... the ones they lose are the very ones that I need to prove my innocence.

I'm not a conspiracy theorist, I'm not an anti-government crackpot... (ok, there may be something to debate there...) but I'm having a difficult time believing, with my sensitive, over-wrought persecution detectors, that this was accidental happenstance. I'd bet every penny they've taken that this is a 'hide-the-ball' tactic to confuse and delay. If you frustrate enough people often enough, some of them give up.  I might not even think this if it weren't for the bureaucratic passive-aggressiveness of the whole thing... I turn in a stack of papers an inch high, then they move to dismiss because I didn't turn it in.

I could talk to somebody, I say to myself... but there isn't anyone. The conversations are either, ‘give me your money,’ or ‘we’re coming after you.’ (Almost the same as the lawyers.) I want to fantasize revenge, but I couldn't even imagine what that would be. Who would I rub out? Which building would I have to blow up? To whom will I administer the Karate-chops to the neck? Which bureaucratic mammal needs the carefully placed red-laser-dots to the forehead?   I could threaten to quit my job...

I’ll get about $650, all told, for this last pay period… about half of what I’d normally get. Immediately, $550 will vanish into thin air leaving me with $100 to stave off starvation and hypothermia until two more weeks go by and I get my next $100 to play with... One hundred dollars for one hundred hours. Forget catching up on bills. Forget going to the dentist. Forget Sundance.

So do I admit to the internets that I'd already be dealing drugs if thought I'd make a good drug dealer? Do I confess that ripping off the IRS or some fat-ass bank would be an experience I’d consider life-enriching?

Hell… six months of armed-robbery on the lamb followed by a thorough machine-gunning sounds more honorable - and certainly more interesting - than this.